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The Story of Connie
Story is my favorite form for finding ourselves. Others experiences weave circumstances together and insights are discovered. I share the story of Connie because I learned something new in my experience with her and how I am shaping my new courses. She also learned and now we are sharing her story so that you may learn the benefits from her that could be yours as well.
The 40 day Dietary Makeover Course that I have launched for years, and was scheduled for this February was altered after my experience with Connie. The purpose for the 40 Days is that it is believed, by those who know, that it takes (so they say) 40 days to unravel a habit and begin a new one that lasts. But, trying to change a dietary pattern with just food skills alone often won’t work because the underlying mind set and/or beliefs that are driving unwanted behavior still exists.
Often, like in the case of Connie, it takes some mind set adjustments as well. When the mind or the beliefs that are driving an unwanted behavior are not recognized and changed, all the skills and pep talks in the world will not change the problem. So, the new course is called “The 40 Day Self Care Mastery”. Read Connie’s story below and find out more about the new course and the wonderful benefits here.
The Story of Connie
Connie came to me really sick. She was having horrible stomach problems intermittently. She had a couple of years throwing up violently, becoming so dehydrated she would have to be hospitalized. She had been to several doctors and had several test including a colonoscopy. Connie is only 55, through menopause (had a hysterectomy several years ago due to endometriosis) medium weight and beautiful. She recently lost about 40 lbs following her divorce 5 years ago. Her long blond hair was falling out and she itched like crazy when a rash on the back of her neck flared up often. She also has a pin in her neck due to spinal stenosis. She came to Maui, living next door to me and asked for my help.
When we had our first consultation about her health, she could not tell me anything definitive about her diagnosis because the doctors could not find a thing. We talked about her diet and the journey began. She loved to cook and bake, but being an un-recognized female dieter, she did not eat much of what she made. She drank caned ice-teas all day long with big glasses of ice water, and munched on empty foods. She ate candy bars, drank coffee with cream and sugar, and snacked on chips and cookies. In her minds eye she did not eat much and was not a junk foodie. But, she was.
Now, here is someone who really does not eat real food very much at all, and who was not totally aware, or in touch with, what she was eating or not eating and or why. She did not think she was addicted to sugar. She also told me she did not drink alcohol. But, every time I turned around she was having a drink. She would have an excuse. “Oh, my body just wanted this right now”, or “I need a drink because I am so nervous”. As for candy and other junk food she would remark, “Look, these were on sale – so cheap I had to get them”.
During our first appointment I encouraged her to:
1. Let go of the candy and reach for whole fruit instead.
2. Although the iced tea was not the end of the world, we investigated and found it was also full of sugar. My recommendation was to let go of the ice tea with sugar, and cut back as much as possible because it was causing her so much acidity along with the inflammation.
3. Gluten was next. Simple, just eat gluten free breads and eat more whole grains.
4. Start eating some “real food” meals. I was not pushing for plant based or any other kind of specific diet because she just needed to get off all the empty foods she was literally poisoning herself with, get her body more alkaline, and start to eat real food.
5. Lastly, she needed an education about GMO and organic food.
Connie acted like she heard me, and seemed enthusiastic about making changes. Silly me thought she heard me. I might as well have been talking to a alcoholic or a person with an opioid addiction. They sit there and agree with everything you say. You think they hear you, but they walk away and just keep doing what they did.
A few weeks went by while I acted like a cop, always catching her in the act of making huge mistakes. I began teaching her how to read labels and where GMO foods were lingering. I also turned her on to FMTV so she could watch nutritional documentaries. This helped a great deal because a movie with several doctors and personal stories backed me up, and offered more solid proof she could relate to.
I finally sat down with her and was very blunt in asking if she wanted me to continue to point out where she was making mistakes. I did not want to make her feel bad and I was starting to feel like a nagging parent. She was cool, and asked that I continue. In addition, once she watched the documentaries she called me to say, “Keep doing what you are doing, this is so important, OMG, I had no idea.”
After about a month Connie went to California to gather her things in order to move to Maui. It was there she reverted to her old ways and became violently ill to the point of being hospitalized (severely dehydrated from throwing up) again. Well, moving will do that to anyone, but it did teach her a lesson. She was again living on ice teas and God only knows what else. Since she was feeling better when she arrived, she thought her body could handle the abuse. This taught her a huge lesson.
My instructions were loud and clear – no more ice tea. Get some bone broths to nourish you, some light juices, and start eating real food – as little sugar as possible. She got better and made the move here – barely. Why did she revert to her old ways? Because she had started to feel improvement and thought she could get away with it. But, here is the cool thing about Connie. She just kept diving in. She was enthusiastic and very willing to take imperfect action. He enthusiasm was awesome. Her mistakes and set backs did not throw her under the bus. She got right back into the game and just keep taking action - some right - some not so right. I loved this about her.
Two months have passed and here is the significance of Connie’s story. For some, change, radical change, takes times. First it was education on how to shop, what to look for and how to read labels. Then skills had to be learned, new routines established, and intuition developed. In addition Connie had to work with the inner game of her food addictions. What I admired about Connie is that she did not give up, even after failing so many times. She had no idea about some of the beliefs that were driving her unconscious behavior.
I have watched her screw up over and over, and now she is starting to feel what happens in her body when she ever she eats the wrong foods. She eats pizza or pancakes when she is out and the itching comes back. Less and less will she purchase or eat these things when she is out because she does not want to suffer anymore. Her body lets her know and she has learned to listen and monitor how it responds. She is getting into her own power. She also went to an acupuncturist and a chiropractor. They told her the same thing I did, so a healthier practice was reinforced.
We introduced her to some supplements and a homeopathic human growth hormone, which really helped her hair to stay on her head. She now eats breakfast, enjoys whole foods more and more. She does not follow any particular diet – she eats from the Earth and not the factory, organic and gluten free and avoids all foods with GMO grown food, which means all bread when dining out. Now and then she has some wine, a clean candy, and bakes some yummy zucchini bread with organic ingredients.
Connie has not gone on a radical diet. She has not even been super successful, but for her, she has made big changes. She is learning how to develop the skills she needs and more than anything the awareness and intuition she needs to work with her inner game of self-care. She still, like the rest of us, has to discover when and where she is fooling herself, along with developing her intuition to discern what is best for her healing, and make choices accordingly. She also had to learn a whole new set of skills.
Here is what working with Connie has taught me:
1. Change often takes time and small steps are all some can do. Imperfect action is better than no action!
2. Radical changes in a diet, those made with dramatic all or nothing changes often do not last. Most fad or radical diets do not last. That said, having a framework for dietary restrictions and inclusions provides a territory to stay within. For instance: eat from the Earth and not the factory, organic, gluten free (unless gluten does not bother you), and non-GMO. If you eat meat and/or dairy choose only organic and grass fed. We could add to purchase local food as much as possible.
3. Developing intuition about our own bodies is a must. With all the diverse diets and information out there, I think we are getting very “heady”. I find it is causing so much confusion for people as they try to fit themselves into some doctor’s idea of what a healthy diet is. Now, of course, the science is important, but have you noticed that most all healthy diets, when adhered to, provide excellent results for the people practicing them? What do these diets have in common? They are all whole plant food based and advocate no processed foods that include bad fats, preservatives, food colorings and additives. This is the diet I recommend.
4. Going out to dine is hard for many people who must rely on restaurants. This was super hard for Connie. She was dating and going out often. Finally she drew a boundary with her new man friend asking that they start making their meals at home. The major thing to look for in dining out is the use of bad fats, low quality ingredients, and GMO foods (most all oils and breads). Restaurants fry a lot of food in less than excellent oils, and most of their dressings are made with the same low quality oils, which are almost always GMO. Ask restaurants for fresh veggies and olive oil. Keep it simple as possible and learn to prepare food ahead of time if possible.
5. Remember if you are eating in a restaurant then you are most likely eating GMO foods in the form of meat and dairy, bread, butter, oils and potatoes.
6. Go to parties fed, unless you know what type of food will be there. If it is a potluck, bring what you would like to eat.
7. We all have various beliefs - some we are blind to - that drive behaviors we don’t always want and/or don’t understand. If you are consistently making choices and acting impulsively, and finding yourself questioning yourself and feeling guilty, it is time to do some introspection. The problem with blind spots is that we cannot see them, so it is often helpful to get assistance. Enlightenment comes in increments, unless we are extremely lucky and get a flash all at once.
The moral of this story is that Connie’s health improved greatly even though she did not always follow an organic plant based, whole food diet. She practiced it for about 50% of the time and she still improved greatly. This is the power of food. So, can you imagine if she went 100%?
I am thinking that she will sail into her sixties and seventies with much better health and beauty if she continues to make positive changes and fully embrace a healthy organic plant based lifestyle.
Don’t beat yourself up if you are in a position where you can’t make all your food, have to eat out a lot when traveling, or if you are busy working. Making full on changes can be overwhelming if your lifestyle does not support it. Keep improving and integrating when and where you can. Don’t give up because all improvements will improve your body, mind and soul as well. If you want longevity, then enhance your self-care practice so that your long life will be one of high quality!
Want to know more about the upcoming “40 Day Self Care Makeover”?
Contact me and let’s discuss if it is the right program for you.
Please comment below: What are your specific challenges? What are your excuses for knowing better but not doing better"? What do you need to learn? How can I help you?
Contact me at: Susan@ChefTeton.com
Aloha!
